This week I read a talk by Bruce C. Hafen called “Covenant Marriage”. It was really powerful and shows how important marriage really is. In this talk he discusses the differences between contractual marriages to covenant marriages. He says:
“When troubles come, the parties to a contractual marriage seek happiness by walking away. They marry to obtain benefits and will stay only as long as they’re receiving what they bargained for. But when troubles come to a covenant marriage, the husband and wife work them through. They marry to give and to grow, bound by covenants to each other, to the community, and to God. Contract companions each give 50 percent, covenant companions each give 100 percent.”
Couldn’t have said it better myself! I love this quote!
After reading and pondering this talk, I’ve thought of a few things that I want to do to ensure that I have a covenant marriage rather than a contractual marriage.
-Focus on putting the Lord first. I want to strive to put Him first in my life, in my marriage, and in my family. When the Lord is put first, EVERYTHING else falls into place. He not only blesses us, but He gives us strength to overcome trials and hardships and the ability to become better.
-Increase in my spirituality with my husband through daily prayer and scripture study together. If we have the Spirit in our lives we will have to power to fight off any temptation.
-Remember that I can do hard things. We weren’t sent down here to earth for it to be easy! So why run when things get hard? I’ve learned that throughout my life every single hard thing I have gone through has made me stronger. Every time.
-Communicate! If there is not open communication, problems are bound to happen. Constant and open communication will keep us on the same page so that we can work together towards keeping a covenant marriage. I’ve noticed that every time my husband and I talk about an issue things instantly get easier and we grow so much closer.
-Sacrifice. Marriage isn’t about me. Marriage is about forgetting myself and focusing on others. There is a strength that comes from sacrificing, and I believe that there is no greater way to increase love for someone than to serve them. “…When ye are in the service of your fellow being ye are only in the service of your God.” –Mosiah 2:17
-Keep the promises that I’ve made with my Heavenly Father. I have made promises at baptism and in the temple. If I can stay true to those, there is no way my marriage will falter.
There are many other ways that I can strive to have a covenant marriage, but these are some of the thoughts that I had. I’m grateful for my marriage. I’m grateful that because I was married in the temple, the Lord’s house, my marriage won’t end at death but it’ll last for eternity. I’m grateful that I have made a covenant with my sweet husband AND with the Lord. My marriage has been such a wonderful gift in my life and I look forward to all that it brings in the future.