Power in Friendship

This week we have started reading “The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work” by John M. Gottman. In it he describes the importance of friendship in marriage. He believes that strong marriages consist of strong friendships. I would have to say that I agree. If a marriage is built on friendship, there’s a special bond already established. The couple knows how to have fun, they can enjoy each other’s company, but most importantly they know each other. They have taken time to know each other’s strengths, weaknesses, fears, dreams, goals, hobbies, likes, dislikes, pasts, trials, etc. With a foundation like that, how can couples fail? I believe that to truly know someone, and to have a strong friendship, you must forget yourself. If we spend so much of our time worried about ourselves and our own problems, we don’t have time to focus on the needs of our loved ones. That is something that I’ve been trying to work on lately. I feel that sometimes I get so caught up in things that I’m dealing with that it’s easy to have too much attention on myself. I’ve noticed that the times that I completely forget myself my marriage feels stronger and I am much happier. I believe that a foundation of friendship makes it easier to resolve problems as well. When conflict comes, those with strong friendships know how to best help each other and wouldn’t want to hurt each other in the first place. Let us all do what we can to become true friends with our spouses.